You can’t control whether or not or you get an illness, though you can do everything possible to stay healthy. Choose. It wasn’t the case, he pointed out, that the outbreak of war had rendered human life suddenly fragile; rather, it was that people were suddenly realising it always had been. It’s not your personality. “Lack of direction, not lack of time, is the problem. Identify your fears. Notice when your mind is drifting to the uncontrollable things. And there’s the rub. Our focus and energy needs to be on the things we CAN control. Take back control of your time by eliminating interruptions. Focus on your journey and do not let dark clouds distract you from reaching that light!!! Focus only on those few things you have any control over, and your life becomes much simpler. (Most of us are vulnerable to what the psychotherapist Bruce Tift calls “annihilatory panic”: the unconscious belief that there are certain feelings that would literally destroy us if we had to feel them.) All you really have is now. (“Even if we hate our jobs, having somewhere to be at 9am is very containing, psychologically,” Marchiano says.) by Matt Hogan; Archives, Picture Quotes; Tags: Calm Quotes Quotes about Taking Control Relax Quotes Stay Calm Quotes Zen Quotes. © 2020 Guardian News & Media Limited or its affiliated companies. It's that you need to … What follows is a lightly edited excerpt from The Focusing Manual, chapter four of Focusing by Eugene Gendlin. Meanwhile, as your to-do list isn’t going anywhere – depending on your situation, it may just have become unfeasibly longer – you’ll need a way to get things done in the presence of uncertainty, and here, too, a short-range, down-to-earth, finitude-focused approach is likely to the most effective. How to Focus on What You Can Control: Focusing on what you can control is so important but you must know the certain aspects in your sport that you can control. You can't go back to how things were, or how you thought they were supposed to be. And in your response is your greatest power. Marie Forleo discusses the importance of focusing on what you can control, versus what you can't control. Concentration Quotes Here's 41 concentration quotes to concentrate on: 1. Life has never been normal.”. (As a specific antidote to anxious feelings, I highly recommend the “shaking practice” demonstrated by the coach Deepika Sheleff on her website, which is what it sounds like – and has the added benefit of being so ridiculous as to be incompatible with total misery. Thoughts Whether you realize it or not you do have the ability to control your thoughts. Inspirational Light Darkest. The smartest thing you can control in life is your reaction to whats beyond your control. Worrying about things you cannot control is folly. Of course, that may be very difficult – but it can get us out of this place where we’re spinning our wheels, trying to fix something it isn’t within our power to fix.”, I recommend the ‘shaking practice’ which has the added benefit of being so ridiculous as to be incompatible with misery, Many of the most fruitful techniques for coping with uncertainty involve a similar move: they are ways to refocus your attention away from your runaway fantasies. Experience the highs and the lows, the positives and the negatives, and all the moods present between the various extremes. As you gain more practice, you won’t need to think of these as six separate parts of the process. “ Don’t worry about what you can’t control. Faith will focus you on the possibilities but fear will focus you on the impossibilities. Aristotle. One overarching strategy for dealing with the experience of intense uncertainty is to do whatever you can to bring yourself back to the world of the finite – to things as they actually are in your own concrete world, and the concrete things you can control. The meditation teacher Kenneth Folk frames this as a matter of “attentional bandwidth”: your capacity to pay attention is strictly limited – and so the more of it you manage to dedicate to the experience you’re having, the less remains available for dwelling on how unpleasant it is. If you focus on change, you will get results." You focus on the things that you can control, and that's what I'm doing. People will always judge you. As the anxiety abates a little, it may even become possible to glimpse the profound truth that, as Marchiano puts it, “a crisis can heighten the opportunity to find meaning, to get clear about what matters most”. You can't control that, but focus on what you can control, family & faith! This is how to stay calm, one Post-it at a time. They control the politicians. Live every day of your life in full. We aren’t as powerless as the coronavirus pandemic makes us feel. Just like slow dripping water can cut into a rock, focusing on what you can do positively will yield great results. My focus was artistic. You’ll get a related “grounding” effect by returning to the body through virtually any form of physical exercise. Take the hit, wipe the blood off and elevate your mind into a different world of self-control. We all … The key thing to understand is that by learning to cope in healthier ways, you will find that you can better handle anything life throws your way, and come out stronger, and oftentimes even happier, than you were before. “Attempting to constantly control everyone and everything around you is not only exhausting...it is also futile. The voice of calm: podcasts to reduce anxiety. Please ensure you include attribution to NotSalmon.com. When you write down your ideas you automatically focus your full attention on them. Appreciate who lifted you up. In this scenario you might also be beating yourself up for having remained in the relationship and put up with bad behavior. 'Focus on the things you can control': how to cope with radical uncertainty We aren’t as powerless as the coronavirus pandemic makes us feel. Focus on living a well-rounded, seasoned life. Copy the HTML embed code (below) to add this image to your website. The smartest thing you can control in life is your reaction to whats beyond your control. To be able… You get nowhere by worrying, it just makes you feel worse. Showing search results for "Focus On What You Can Control" sorted by relevance. Our goal is to help you by delivering amazing quotes to bring inspiration, personal growth, love and happiness to your everyday life. When you feel in control, you feel responsible; you participate and do whatever is necessary. You should focus on why perhaps you can, and be one of the exceptions.” — Steve Case. Matt Cameron. But I’m willing to bet the majority of these things are still within your grasp. This is how to stay calm, one Post-it at a time, Sat 28 Mar 2020 08.00 EDT Zig Ziglar on the importance of direction. Unsurprisingly, this feeds the destructive and self-perpetuating thought pattern that cognitive therapists call “catastrophising”: taking every morsel of bad news as evidence that things are going to be globally, absolutely and eternally terrible. Focus on what you can control. You can’t force your spouse to change, you can’t prevent a storm from happening, and you can’t control how other people feel. And some of these things may not be in your control, if, for example, you’re struggling with a debilitating illness. Adjust your attitude, and all that extra stress is gone. Control Quotes - BrainyQuote. We cant control everything about our lives, but working towards a goal gives us something positive to focus on and lays the foundation for future success. The more time and energy we’re spending on the things we can’t control, the less time and energy we’re spending on the ways in which we can make a … Focus on what you can control and take your game to the next level. And it implies that we might be much better than we think at dealing with radical uncertainty – because in fact, every hour of every day, we already do. “It simply aggravates the permanent human situation so that we can no longer ignore it. “The war creates no absolutely new situation,” Lewis said. This is a great quote. Lisa Marchiano, a therapist and writer based in Philadelphia, suggests making it your mission “to tolerate uncertainty, rather than having to make it go away. You can’t control what people think of you, though you can try do you best to build a good reputation. Instead of focusing on things that we can’t control or influence, we need to focus on what we can control and learn to accept what we can’t. Yes, most of your stress comes directly from the way you think and respond, not the way life is. If we train ourselves to focus on what we want, things will start falling into place. You can control what you eat, how much attention you pay to your breathing, and how long you … Acknowledge your feelings and disappointment. As a first step, try not to see anxious feelings as something you’ve got to get rid of. Always be yourself and stay true. One of my favorite of these quotes is number 120 “You shouldn’t focus on why you can’t do something, which is what most people do. Focus on when you want it. Focusing on the present moment can transform our perspective on life and rid us of our worries and depression. When you’ve no idea what tomorrow will bring, it’s easy to fill that gap with fantasy, and the world of fantasy knows no bounds. In this time of acute collective anxiety, this sort of insight might not bring much peace of mind on its own. “We cannot control the way people interpret our ideas or thoughts, but we can control the words and tones we choose to convey them. Never underestimate the power of a single … Peace is built on understanding, and wars are built on misunderstandings. It’s not ingrained. Vyergin winked. You can influence people and circumstances, but you can't force things to go your way. As Lewis said: “If men had postponed the search for knowledge and beauty until they were secure, the search would never have begun.”, The meditation teacher Jack Kornfield explores Buddhist paths to peace of mind amid the pandemic in a Tim Ferriss Show podcast: tim.blog/podcast, Ten Percent Happier, a podcast and meditation app, has a free sanity guide: tenpercent.com/coronavirussanityguide, The Insight Timer app offers a vast collection of free guided meditations for anxiety, stress and much more: insighttimer.com, Andrew Weil demonstrates a speedy intervention for bodily calm, the 4-7-8 breathing technique, on his website: drweil.com, Three Jungian analysts discuss the deeper meanings and unexpected opportunities of the coronavirus outbreak in their podcast, thisjungianlife.com. An event occurs; it’s over; then the people directly affected can begin to reconfigure their lives. You can't go back to how things were, or how you thought they were supposed to be. Don't focus on simply being happy. Dr. … Focus on What You Can Control for Better Results When you spend your time in “what if” mode wishing that things had been different, you aren’t moving forward. Today, I want to share with you 21 classic quotes … There’s solace to be found in figuring out what this moment demands from you, then doing it as well as you can. They control the pattern of consumption, entertainment, thinking. Bruce Lee "If you focus on results, you will never change. 3245 matching entries found. If you’re confined to your home at the moment, giving yourself some structure by drawing up an approximate schedule can reconnect you to the texture of the day. to join. Sometimes, all you can control is your effort and your attitude. Thank you! "No point in wasting your days trying to control what you can't.”. Blaming and pointing fingers at other people will not make you any better. Home > Picture Quotes Focus on what you can control. Your personality is something else, something deeper than just preferences, and these details on the surface, you can change anytime you like. Don't worry about the things in life you have no control over, instead focus your energy on the things you can change, being positive and confident keep us looking forward instead of looking backwards. Dwelling on negativity from the past simply contributes to its power. But, then again, nobody has ever known what tomorrow held – yet life has always gone on, including its most uplifting forms. May these quotes inspire you to take control of your life and elevate it to the level that you know within yourself you can take it. At the end of the day, you can either focus on what's tearing you apart, or you can focus on what's keeping you together. Ask yourself what you are afraid will happen: Are you predicting a catastrophic … Simply enter your email below and click, "I'm In!" Focus on His light when you're in the dark. It's free and designed to keep you focused on moving forward—the ONLY direction! Focus on getting it. Make a list of all the things you can control in your sport, such as effort, your role, and attitude. ), There’s no harm in a little distraction, if you can manage it. Don't worry about the things that you can't control instead focus on the things that you can control. At the end of the day you either focus on what's tearing you apart or you focus on what's holding you together. Few if any of us can write one thought and think another at the same time. You see yourself as someone who can’t write or play an instrument, who gives in to temptation or makes bad decisions, but that’s really not you. The special trouble with uncertainty is that it’s a doorway to infinity. They're destroying the planet and laying the foundation for violent outbursts and racial division. It’s your decisions, your outcomes, your life.” Soon, you’ll accumulate a pleasing number of Post-its, a testament to all the constructive stuff you’ve managed to get done. You might feel that you wasted time. In another demonstration of the power of returning to concrete reality, if you spend a few moments paying attention as closely as possible to the physical sensations you’re experiencing at this very moment, you’ll probably find them much easier to tolerate. (Complement this with the powerfully calming 4-7-8 breathing technique: breathe in through your nose for a count of four, hold your breath for a count of seven, then exhale through your mouth, emptying the lungs as fully as possible, for a count of eight.). You can’t control your employers or the job market. Focusing on what we can’t control makes us less effective and potentially leads to the outcomes we fear the most. You can’t control everything that happens to you, but you CAN control the way you respond. While you're already focused on your own actions, you're still trapped in focusing on what you can't change (the past). Pick a task, write it on a Post-it, position it somewhere prominent, then do that task; for that moment, it’s the only goal you need to worry about accomplishing. “What if” mode paralyzes you and prevents you from actually accomplishing something. It won’t change the fact that nobody knows what tomorrow holds. ... Don’t focus on who let you down. It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light. Quotes tagged as "focus-on-what-you-can-control" Showing 1-2 of 2. “Good boy." Since my new focus is acting, ¦ my primary focus was bringing David Burkes character to life. So stop focusing on what happened and start focusing on whats going to move you forward. You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it … Be aware when you start to focus on what you can’t change or control in your sport. Focus on what you want. Anthony Robbins "The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus." God has everything under control. Positive Life Live Life. You can’t do fifty things at once anyway. All rights reserved. By contrast, when even extremely bad things happen, the situation, however dire, remains finite. The Things That We Control. Embed this image on your site. Available for everyone, funded by readers. It’s possible to imagine things getting limitlessly bad. It may not look like anything heroic from the outside. Thus a pencil and paper make excellent concentration tools. Live life to the fullest, and focus on the positive. Even at the best of times, it’s a good idea to limit the number of tasks you’re working on at any given moment to three or four, seeing them through to completion before embarking on others; and in times of high stress, it may be worth reducing that limit to one. (“Maybe it’s just making sure the kids stay on top of their schoolwork, or doing your job as a clerk in a grocery store,” Marchiano says.) Focus Quotes - BrainyQuote. But one of the most intriguing insights of Buddhist psychology is that focusing on discomfort is even more effective. Scenario you might also be beating yourself up for having remained in the relationship put! Add this image to your website: podcasts to reduce anxiety Quotes Here 's 41 Quotes! End, the situation, ” Lewis said special trouble with uncertainty is it’s. 'M doing world is as you are inside exhausting... it is also futile of... To life not or you get nowhere by worrying, it just makes you feel responsible ; you and. 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